I spend what some people would say an “unreasonable amount of time” stalking celebrities. I watch interviews on YouTube, read magazines aimed at brace-faced teenyboppers, and shamelessly peruse Internet sites like Perez Hilton. I expose myself to almost every form of media to learn more about my favorite celebrities. And I’ve learned a lot in my time. For example, I know that Amanda Seyfried’s dog, Finn, can balance things on his head. And I know Jennifer Lawrence sometimes pees her pants when she’s nervous (which makes her even more endearing to me).
But I recently made a stunning revelation: Emma Stone and I were meant to be best friends. It’s not because she’s rich and famous and one of the most sought after actors in Hollywood. And it’s not because a “Who’s Your Celebrity BFF” online quiz told me so (at least that’s not the only reason). She just seems like a genuinely cool person. And she gives great advice. If ever I was feeling self-conscious about my body, I bet she’d tell me what she said in 2011’s Glamour magazine: “You’re a human being. You live once and life is wonderful, so eat the damn red velvet cupcake.”
If you’re thinking, “how would you ever hang out with her? She’s too busy,” then think again. Emma has her priorities straight when it comes to making time with friends and family. She once said, “I will always want to take breaks (from work) and I wouldn’t be OK with losing that.”
I can imagine us hanging out on a Friday night, watching The Jerk, talking about her boy troubles (which I could totally relate to!). “Ugh, I was making out with Ryan Gosling at work today and Andrew was being so weird about it.” OK that may be a little difficult to relate to.
But Emma and I have a ton of other things in common. As kids, we both loved using PowerPoint (don’t judge). I used to spend hours making elaborate slides about my favorite movies, complete with pictures and plot synopses. And what would you know, when she was 14, Emma persuaded her parents to let her move to Hollywood and start acting with a PowerPoint presentation.
So there it is. Proof that Emma Stone and I should be best friends. Now all I have to do is drop out of school, move to Hollywood, and convince Emma to hang out with me. Maybe I’ll make a PowerPoint presentation to convince her.
The College Gal 